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I DON’T WANT TO GO! – Making Transitions Easier

Most young children have some difficulty at one time or another making the change from one activity to another. It may be just trying to get your child to leave the playground or getting them out the door for a doctor’s appointment. Transitions are often unwelcome daily challenges that become a difficult time for everyone involved. Helping your child move easily from one activity to another is a major goal for most parents and caregivers. The following ideas will help both you and your child move less stressfully through your daily activities and enjoy them more.

It is a good idea to begin your child’s day by telling them what activities you will be doing. You should make a routine of this. You may want to do this while dressing your child or over breakfast, but be consistent and tell your child what is expected of him/her. For example, you might say “We are going to meet Peter and his mom at the park after breakfast and then we will go food shopping after that, etc. If you want to bring a book to look at while we are shopping you can pick one and bring it with you.”

It does not mean that your child will remember all of this, but you have made them aware of what will be going on during the day and what they need to do. You will have a greater chance at success if you include children in the process as much as possible.

Young children do not understand the concept of time. You do not want to tell them that you will be leaving in five minutes. To get your child ready to leave a location or end an activity, explain it by defining the end of an activity. You might want to say, “After you ride your bike around the playground three more times it will be time for us to go. Then we will have lunch. If you continue to behave as nicely as you are now you can have a special treat – maybe an ice cream for dessert.”

Then make a game of it. Try counting out loud every time your child passes. Be sure to let her/him know when there is only one more time left. Congratulate them for making it to the finish line. You have not only given your child a definite time frame that he/she can understand, you have made it fun and you have also directed the focus onto something else. In this example it is an ice cream to reward the good behavior. Other rewards can be reading a favorite book to them or doing a special project together. Do not forget to always verbally praise any behavior that you want your child to repeat.

By offering choices you can provide your child with the help he/she might need to find a way to end an activity. When leaving a location try asking your child whether or not they would like their playmate to walk her/him to the car or race him/her to the gate. If you give your child more than two choices it will make it more difficult for them. Sing a transition song, or put on some music that will help her/him to move along to the next activity.

Your child is more likely to accept a move from one activity to another if you allow him/her to participate. While getting your things together ask your child to do some of the more fun things. See if he/she can throw the trash in the can and make a basket. Children love to count. Who can get dressed the quickest.

Some days it seems that nothing works. But, if we consistently use these ideas in helping our children they too will learn that it is more fun to work together.

These dreaded situations could actually turn into some fun time.